
I watched him approach, the summer sun reflecting off the white stick making its own music, tap-click-tap-tap, as it hit the sidewalk. The girl holding his hand looked to be about 11 years old, my age. Fascinated by his blank eyes that looked heavenward, I found myself unable to turn away. Knowing that it was rude to continue my scrutiny, I forced my chin to move; my eyes following at a slower pace. It was then that I noticed her eyes. Those clear, brown eyes were staring at me; then, just as quickly, she tilted her chin and looked at the ground.
Eventually, the girl and I became friends for a school year. Because it was just the two of them, her life centered around her dad’s needs. Even though I was responsible for the laundry in my home, I still had plenty of time for me. She didn’t. Back then, there was no ADA, no reasonable accommodation, and certainly no stoplights that talked or beeped. It didn’t occur to me until just recently how difficult her life must have been.
A parent with special needs compelling his child into a life of servitude. She never complained. He always complained – about the failure of social services.
The next summer, they were forced to move into a housing project that was a community of the marginalized, poor, and disabled.
Where was our charity?
I grew up reading Charles Dickens. Loved the guy with his embellished stories and characters that were characters .
With strong imagery to support his rich and complex stories, there was much to glean from his writing. Nevertheless, Dickens’ social criticism bore into the inner layers of my young heart. The contrasts between the lifestyle of the affluent and the destitute were strong and severe. Lurking in the background, society’s lack of compassion compelled the orphans to be pickpockets and the beggars to be connivers. Otherwise, they could not survive. Having lived in a time when America’s streets were not congested with the disenfranchised, who were forced to expose the intimacy of their lives, I wondered how could respectable people walk by the needy without acknowledging them.
Then, the 1980s hit, and President Regan made changes to the Housing and Urban Development’s policies. Trickles of homeless people started to leak onto the streets. Today, we have neighborhoods of cardboard homes tucked away in the dirty corners of unwanted land. These communities are filled with the mentally, physically, and financially disabled. Dickens’ world is our world. History has repeated itself once more. We have become the respectable people who walk by the needy without acknowledging them.
Where is our charity?
In 1990, the American Disabilities Act provided for regulation of handicapped parking spaces. Based on my observations at the time, the spaces were usually empty. So, I concluded that there were too many spaces set aside. Besides, I thought, how many disabled people could there be? I knew of only one. My uncle – who never went out unless it was for a doctor’s appointment. Yes. I was ignorant and callous.
Nevertheless, the handicapped spaces were left pristine.
Today, violations are rampant. It is common to see people park in handicapped spaces without the required placard or plate. Setting aside those who appear to be healthy but are justified in their use of handicapped spaces, we know that there are many people who use the spaces illegally. In San Francisco, the misuse of the spaces is so egregious that the fine for one violation is $1,000. Yet, the law has no bite.
We have become a society that clamors for justice. However, when it comes to examining ourselves, well, we don’t.
Will there be charity?
“Did universal charity prevail, earth would be a heaven, and hell a fable.”
Charles Caleb Colton
While struggles make for good fiction, seeing the underlying brokeness of society makes for great fiction. Living graciously along side those who struggle begins with us changing our understanding of charity. Your blog reminds me that I struggled to appreciate the challenges facing those living with disabilities till I was personally confronted. Even now I need to remind myself to acknowledge that each person with a disabilty has challenges that I or others can’t necessarily relate to, yet to be afirming of the person.
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Thanks, Jasper. To remember that each person, neurotypical or not, has a disability is challenging. To treat everyone with charity even more so.
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